Can We Accept Other People’s Cultures Pretty Please?

September 21, 2014 Uche Umolu Comments Off

Dear Americans,

I love y'all to death. I really do. I mean why else would I leave my family, my life, and my Staffordshire and pit bull mix dog (who just had beautiful puppies), behind to come spend 4 years of my life with you guys.

Aren't they like the cutest puppies ever?

So yeah you get the point, I really love you guys. Therefore, the least you can do is sometimes accept that there are different cultures around you (Mine being a British Nigerian fusion.) Some of us are really different from you guys, okay? Many of the international students feel the same way too. We might dress different, and maybe act different. Some of you have fully accepted this. But, most importantly, we speak differently than you guys. This is where I have a problem, and I am not talking accents.

First of all, can I be allowed to just say chips rather than fries? My first day at hawks nest was actually spent arguing with the really nice cashier why I wanted CHIPS not FRIES. I actually spent a good 2 mins (unfortunately for my fellow Wagnerians behind me in the queue) explaining why I would like to peacefully refer to deep fried diced potatoes as just chips. Like cut me some slack, I have called them chips all my life. Like sorry I didn't get a dictionary for the American lingo before ordering my food. So I can I just say chips pretty please?

Secondly, as a football fanatic, can I just be allowed to call it that and not soccer. Like okay I get it, you guys have American football. but that still does not mean I have to change the name of a sport I have known as only one thing my entire life. Fun fact: America is the only country that actually refers to it as football. So if anything I should be correcting you. I don't even understand why American football is referred to as such. I mean you throw balls around right? You're not kicking them like in soccer? RIGHT? Can I just call it football in peace, pretty please?

So I have taken the good liberty of giving you a few basic words used in America and words used in Britain (or British colonised countries) that do have the same meaning. Just in case you bump into another one of my kind.

AMERICAN WORDS/ BRITISH WORDS THAT DO ACTUALLY HAVE THE SAME MEANING:

You say Bathroom, We say Loo. Trust me it means the same thing, whether you are doing the number 1 or the number 2.
And for you high testosterone driven males, You say chicks, we say bird. Both unfortunately refer to women. I personally dislike both words but you get the point.
You say Doctor, We say GP (we have doctors too don't worry, its just complicated). It basically means the same thing, we are all trying to get healed too.
You say dining hall/cafeteria. We say canteen. Same basic meaning once again, a place to eat.
You say cigarettes, We say fags. No, we are in no shape or form trying to be offensive, but it really is what we refer to cigarettes as.

So there you have it, different words but same meaning. So please don't roll your eyes or give the 'she's so different look,' or the most annoying 'could you repeat yourself,' line when you hear something different. Just accept it as it is. Since we love you Americans and your culture, love us too!